Tomorrow is Mother’s Day here in America, another Hallmark
institution designed to ‘honor’ mom and sell greeting cards. Outside of her birthday, mom’s rarely get
this kind of attention throughout the year.
Let’s face it Christmas, and anniversaries are mutual holidays where
mom’s giving skills are equally employed with her receiving skills. But for her birthday, and perhaps on this
manufactured holiday, we give mom some long overdue credit for just being a
mom. Just the idea that mom may deserve
some credit is interesting to me. Could
it be that we use this occasion to call to remembrance the infinite number of
times mom has sacrificed her own well being and interests for us? Could it be in our normally self-obsessed and
self-interested world, we pause briefly to acknowledge that our mom may have
given up a few of her own dreams to insure ours were possible?
Of course all these sentiments could equally be expressed
for dad on his day as well. So I am not
trying to say either parent deserves or doesn’t any less attention than the
other. But I find it interesting how we
view our mothers, and how often we think of them as saints for their seemingly
tireless efforts on our behalf, and their willingness to sacrifice for us. The most famous mother of all time seems to
have been Mary, the mother of Christ. A
young, devoted, pure bride whose burden it was to carry our Lord while still a
virgin. Christians have faith to accept
this premise. The entire rest of the
world does not. She was ridiculed by her
own, and since then, decried as nothing more than another out-of-wedlock teen
who got caught in her own illicit behavior.
Ironic the unwarranted shame that would be expected for her to
bare. Yet she should feel none. Also ironic that Mary quickly achieves
saint-hood in the eyes of the Christian church for not much more than simply
being the mom of Christ. While Joseph on
the other hand barely gets a mention.
The surrogate earthly father of Christ lives and dies a righteous life
in relative obscurity while his more famous mate lives on in sculpture,
paintings, and sermon topics.
Perhaps the second most famous mom on earth is Mother Teresa
of India. Here was another woman who
while having no children of her own, was the adopted mother of millions of
orphans. Her fame spread far and wide
for the sake of her work. After her
death, her doubts and humanity came to view, but her work remains
unquestioned. What is the lesson of these
mom’s? Does God offer us mothers to
teach us how willing He is to sacrifice His own well being for our
interests? Can Christ be anything but
the supreme example of self sacrifice for us?
What about the bond between mother and child, what lessons
are to be learned there. We watch the
momma duck walking towards the water‘s edge with each baby duckling walking in
a line behind her. She has only to quack
at a certain tone and a certain volume and her chicks will gather close around
her struggling to get under her wings.
So with us, our very young struggle to be close and feel safe near their
mother’s. Our court systems have long
deferred to the idea that mother’s seem uniquely suited to put the needs of
their children ahead of their own. Of
course there are exceptions to every rule, but in general this idea has proven
true for years. Men and Fathers tend to
be more practical, and while they will sacrifice for their families, they tend
to be more big-picture than tuned to the needs of the individual child. Mom’s tend to tune-in there. Does the bond between mom and child also
represent the bond God wants between each of us and Him? Does the very inspiration to sacrifice and
preserve the specie itself originate in the heart of a creator God who Himself
gives all for His creations?
So what do we truly owe our mothers beyond our
existence? Giving birth was her choice
after all not ours, so it seems we owe little for that. But the care for us, the love for us, the
concern for us, and the sacrifice for us – how do we go about repaying
that? It might begin with the
realization that indeed our moms owe us NOTHING. Wait a minute you say, having children comes
with responsibilities. You can’t just
produce kids and have nothing to do with them afterwards. Really?
OK you should not produce them and have nothing to do with them.
A child of choice and a child of accident may face different
parental reactions. And while we
reasonably expect a parent to bare the responsibilities of having a child – responsibility
hardly is the right term to measure the depth of love most mother’s show to
their children. The sacrifice most mom’s
make on behalf of their children could hardly be put under the term
responsibility from any other perspective than that of a completely selfish
child. Mom’s give and give and give
because they love. So it is with
God. He gives to us because He loves. The child may not seem worthy of the gifts he
is given in our eyes, by his mom, or by his God – but worthiness is not the reason
gifts are extended – love is. God gives
even more than mom gives – because He loves.
Ever wonder what it is like to face an angry lioness in the
wild? Attack a child in the presence of
it’s mother, and you will witness this simulation. There is a reason why the metaphor of lioness
is used when discussing the defensive posture or nature of a mother with her
child. Mom’s seem to be able to summon
super-human strength, speed, and agility when it comes to defending their
young. It is not so much that their
physical prowess is intimidating to an intruder, but the tenacity in their
eyes, and the determination in their hearts can frighten the largest
assailant. Now extrapolate this lesson
to God. God who tenderly sees all of us
as His children, the treasures of His eyes; Those who would dare to attack his
little ones face not just an angry determined woman – but the God of an entire
universe with unlimited power, strength, and determination. The instinct to protect that a mom feels
begins in the heart of her creator God.
What does it mean then to honor mom or dad? Perhaps it means recognizing our own
unworthiness, and the gifts we have been given in spite of it. Perhaps similar to how our salvation works,
our parents give us unconditional love, acceptance, protection, and care. We did not ask for this as babies, in fact,
we were incapable of asking for this as babies – but it was given not because
of how much we loved – but because of how much our parents loved. Despite the imperfections of humanity, we
have an example of what it means to love someone with regards to self. We have an example of what it means to care
for someone who may or may not be able to acknowledge the extent of your gift. The younger the child, the more the care
required, and the less the recognition they are able to discern of it.
What does it mean to honor mom or dad? Maybe it means that as we grow older and as
our parents lose their status as being at the top-of-their-game due to age –
that we become the patient care givers.
Maybe it means that we begin to forego some of our dreams or ambitions
for the sake of care for an elder.
Perhaps it means that we return some of the unconditional love that
forgives a parent’s mistakes and remembers only their love. Perhaps to honor our parents is to remember
how much MORE than responsibility was their gift to us. Perhaps to truly honor their sacrifice is to
strive to become worthy of it. To be
people who are able to give to others even when it means inconvenience to
self. This is the lesson of a mom.
No matter what the family structure, no matter how
traditional or untraditional a family may choose to be, there is always a place
for mom. To that person in your life who
loves you, cares for you, raised you from your youth – to that person you
should add your blessing. A recognition,
and a thanks, even on a manufactured holiday, seems little enough for the
enormity of what they have done. If you
wish to honor them, move beyond greeting cards, frequent hugs, and constant
well wishes – become a person of sacrifice yourself. In this way, your days will not only be long
in the land in which the Lord gives you, in addition your days will be worth
living in His land. A life of love is a
life of happiness…
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